"It's my job to work on my inability to see your value and worth, not your job to prove it to me."
A young man walks into the store at 8am with tattered clothing and untamed hair. A customer at the counter turns to see who has walked in and displays a look of disapproval or disgust, then pays for the items and walks out after thanking the clerk. As the customer walks out, the they lock eyes and the man is seen trying to run his fingers through his hair and fix his clothing.
The young man is trying to prove his worth, when the action lies within the customer to deal with the internal issues that do not allow them to see that the young man is worth more than a displeasing glare.
This is what we see everyday in our society. the expectation that it is the other person's responsibility to fix our inability to see them in as humans. Furthermore, we then have been conditioned to try to meet these expectations as a means to earn worth, respect, opportunities, support, etc. We cannot fix problems in others that we did not create, we can only continue enabling or stand firm in our own identity in hopes of bringing awareness to it, to evoke change.
If you are caught in the vicious cycle of trying to find a solution to a problem that someone else has with you, then maybe it deserves a deeper assessment to truly determine whose habits or beliefs created it and whose hands the responsibility lies within to fix it.
If you're lucky, you'll happen upon the lost place (where you will re-introduce yourself to yourself) and know exactly where to go, with confidence...Read Now
If you're lucky, one day you’ll find yourself in lost place and your mind will instantly know which way to go. You’ll feel so content and free to be yourself, love yourself in the very condition you are in, and comfortably aspire to be and do what your heart desires. You’ll release the need respond to every experience in your life the way you've been taught to and know that we are all human. You will FEEL your emotions, however trivial or extreme, and know that they are not the end of the world nor do they require that you give a predetermined response.
As you walk alone, you will find that aloneness does not mean alone, unworthy, or waiting. Child-less does not mean less of who God created us to be. Many of us have shopped in society to buy our dreams: the white-picket fence, the prestige of title, the home that appears unlived in and costs a fortune in energy and time we are away from our families to afford it, the vehicle that no one can eat in and takes a fourth (or more) of our monthly salary.
As you awaken to a world of all-things-beautiful, you’ll find that your weight and body type does not require adjusting to make others comfortable in the name of health, nor does it have any relation to your worth or self-esteem. You no longer tell people how good they look because they’ve lost weight or how proud you are of them because they’ve accomplished what society deems appropriate, yet lost true soul, compassion, often integrity, joy and originality. There will be no need for shapers, religiously followed diets, or 100 selfies until the right one filters through.
Here you have permission to love yourself and others despite differences and/or experiences. In this space there is no need for jealousy, competition, or to meet others' expectations. You can forgive or accept others without explanation (because you love them or desire to have them in your life). You will no longer ditch relationships because they do not live up to unreasonable standards, pretend as though you own others, or demand compliance. You are free to distance yourself from things that don’t align with your personal peace without offending.
Shame of the past and current status will be laid aside to make room for confidence, assurance, and gratitude for the experiences life has afforded you. With this gratitude for life comes the compassion and empathy for all others that have not happened upon the lost place, where the only things lost are the very learned behaviors that drove us astray from this “happy” place initially.
I am a 36 year old wife and mother of three children. I love all-things creative and writing thought-provoking posts. I began documenting #MyEarlyMorningThoughts about two years ago and have since received many requests to begin blogging and to continue posting about everyday life, growth, maturity, and christian concepts. Don't be shy, feel free to comment your life experiences and wisdom on any post.